But not today dammit! I can not waste my time like this anymore. Last night I almost did let it over take me. I sat in front of the TV, I felt sick, and simply depressed. Even this morning I turned off my alarm and didn't go running. But overall, I am lucky. A few years ago, I literally beat myself up and recognized these dark days. I consider myself lucky because I have become able to see my dark days coming and have learned to head them off. Never without support, and at first not with out medical help. But now I have a great support system, and a great routine to help me through.
So, this morning I got up and weeded my garden. And right before lunch I got up and went for a hard, but good run. I thought to myself, "well, looks like I got two options right now. Turn into a buttercup, or start to suck it up." It looks like it's going to be a rough next few days, that's ok, cause I'm worth it.